Body image and body worries

Lots of young people worry about different parts of their bodies - so if you think you're the only one feeling anxious, relax, you're not.

People come to us with all sorts of concerns about their bodies, and most of the time they're completely normal.

Every body is different

Everyone's different, you've probably heard it a million times before, but it's true. Look around you on the bus and in the street and you'll see a wide range of shapes, sizes and colours. No one is any better or more right or regular than the next.

Just like noses, mouths and eyes...penises, breasts and vaginas come in all shapes and sizes. The trouble is, it's not often that you get to see what other people's look like, so it can be difficult to know what normal is.

The truth is, everyone's bits and pieces are a bit different, and everyone goes through puberty at different times and speeds. So really, there's no need to spend lots of time comparing yourself to other people.

Your body, confidence and sex

If you're worried about having sex with someone because of things that you don't like on your body, then try talking to them about it. Most people have their own little anxieties about their body, so chances are there will be things that they are worried about too. It will feel more comfortable for both of you if you can be open and honest.

If you're feeling insecure, sometimes it might feel like having sex will make you feel more confident about your body, but that may not really be the case. Try not to get in a situation where you're relying on others to make you feel good about yourself. If you're worrying about how you look, try focusing on what you do like, rather than the bits you don't - it can really help to boost your body confidence. And, anyway, little imperfections, lumps and bumps make us interesting and unique.

The media, models and porn stars

In the media, you'll see lots of stereotypes of what 'perfection' is meant to look like, and you may feel like you should look like that too. Actually, most of what you see in magazines and advertising is airbrushed, which means it's made to look flawless on a computer. In real life, the models in those adverts and magazines don't look like that.

So next time you're looking through a magazine or watching TV and you think "why don't I look like that?" try thinking "why do they only show people like that?"

Porn often shows unrealistic body shapes, especially when it comes to things like breasts, penises, testicles and vaginas. In real life, not that many women have naturally thin stomachs and big breasts. In fact porn actresses have sometimes had plastic surgery.

The men's bodies are often unrealistic too, penises that you see in porn are almost always above average size and men often rely on viagra to get erections. So don't stress if the sex you're having doesn't look like porn sex - they're actors and you're not.

In reality we all look a bit different, and everybody is attracted to different types of people. It's good to have your own look and your own views, everyone's different and that's what makes the world interesting!

If you have any questions about your body or you are worried about something you can speak to an Ask Brook advisor on 0808 802 1234. Your call will be free and confidential which means that no one will be told about it.