Diagnosed with HIV at 22: Adam’s story

You might already know me as a cast member from I Kissed a Boy Season 2—the guy who shared his HIV diagnosis in episode three. Or you might not know me at all, in which case, hi. I’m Adam. I was diagnosed with HIV in 2020, and today I use my platform to educate others on what living with HIV really means in the present day. This is my story.

It was the summer of 2020. The world had slowed to a standstill as COVID-19 took over and we entered lockdown. I suddenly came down with the worst flu of my life—swollen lymph nodes, a pounding headache, and relentless night sweats. I brushed it off, doing the very British thing of “keep calm and carry on.”

But this was different. It was aggressive, and unlike anything I’d ever felt before—and hope never to feel again. There were moments I considered going to the hospital, but with the world’s attention fixed firmly on COVID-19, it didn’t feel important enough. Eventually, the worst of it passed after spending long days in bed, resting and trying to recover.

Even though the flu cleared, my lymph nodes were still swollen and painful, so I wanted to doublecheck if there was something else that could hopefully be dealt with by getting some antibiotics to clear it, so I could then get on with life. Around that time, I also got a text reminder that I should do a routine sexual health test. So, I ordered an at-home test, did it, sent it off and waited.

I had received a text from Sexual Health London, telling me that my results had come back inconclusive and I had to go into the sexual health clinic for a follow-up. I knew something was awry in that moment; they don’t normally text you that for an inconclusive result.

In that moment, I had pieced everything together and knew that HIV was on the cards.

I was overwhelmed with emotion. If I hadn’t taken an at-home test, I might not have caught it as early as I did, and I don’t think I’d be as healthy as I am today. Being diagnosed with HIV was one of the hardest things I’ve ever faced mentally. But physically, it forced me to take my power back. I learned how to listen to my body, care for it, and truly understand what I want out of life.

More than five years have passed since my diagnosis, and I’m still me—actually, I’m better than I was in that moment. With time, knowledge, and care, I’ve learned a few important things along the way:

1. HIV does not define you. Yes, HIV is a lifelong condition, but with medication, you can live a long, healthy, and fulfilling life.
2. U = U. With consistent treatment, your viral load can become so low that it’s undetectable, which means it’s untransmittable—you cannot pass it on.
3. Time really is a healer. Your mind and body need time to process and heal after a diagnosis. Be gentle with yourself and give yourself grace. Being diagnosed with HIV can feel overwhelming, but you can get through this.

Getting tested quite literally changed my life.

Not because it gave me bad news, but because it gave me answers, access to treatment, and control. HIV testing isn’t about fear or shame — it’s about knowing your status and looking after yourself.

Taking charge of your sexual health means being proactive, even when you feel fine or think “it won’t happen to me.” I didn’t think it would happen to me either. When I was in bed with the worst flu of my life, I didn’t think this was where I’d be heading. HIV doesn’t always come with obvious symptoms, and testing early means you can start treatment sooner, protect your health, and prevent passing it on to others.

Testing today is more accessible than ever, whether that’s through at-home kits, routine check-ups, or sexual health clinics. What might feel like a small or scary step can be completely life-changing. Getting tested is an act of self-care, self-respect, and responsibility — for yourself and for the people you’re intimate with.