Men in film: How positive male characters can inspire boys and men

As part of their FeelScene campaign, Brook’s 20-24 Participation Advisory Group (PAG) are reflecting on the ways that media has shaped our perceptions of sex, relationships and identity. In this blog, Eliza explores examples of positive male role models in film and asks the question, if we had more real representation on our screens, would boys and men feel more inspired?

Content Warning: Some of the films discussed in this blog contain themes of mental health and suicide. 

When I think about the male characters in TV shows and films I’ve seen recently, I feel a bit… meh?  

I recently watched Maid, a fantastic TV show about a young woman who is running away from her abusive partner, but I found all the male characters to be pretty uninspiring. They’re abusive, absent, don’t stand up for her, fall short of their duties as a father or partner or are just quite frankly a bit boring. 

This is a pattern I’ve often found in films and TV shows and as part of our Participation Advisory Group project, FeelScene, I wanted to give a shout out to the films and TV shows which have some beautifully complex, emotional male characters. They might not always get it right but are trying their best to show up for the people in their lives: proud fathers, loving grandfathers, supportive partners, and caring friends.  

Vincent and Oliver in St Vincent (2014)  

Maggie, a warm-hearted, loving mother, moves to New York with her beautiful son, Oliver. She has no family or support, works long hours and struggles to be a present mum. Her rude, very selfish neighbour, Vincent, has very few people in his life. His wife, who was clearly the love of his life, is ill, and he doesn’t have any family, leaving him very lonely.  

Begrudgingly, Vincent starts looking after Oliver, and gradually a slightly odd relationship blossoms between them with Vincent acting as a pseudo-father in the absence of Oliver’s dad. Vincent teaches Oliver how to stand up for himself, be confident, and tells him about the world. Looking after Oliver seems to be the first unselfish thing Vincent has done in a long time, and Oliver’s wide-eyed childish curiosity about the world seems to gradually melt Vincent’s walls away and gives him a reason to have hope in the world again.  

Oliver is a brave, courageous, emotional child who is one of the best characters I’ve ever watched. This film has so many lovely characters and really reminded me of the power of building your own family and support network. 

Sean (the therapist) in Good Will Hunting (1998) 

When we first meet Will he is in many ways the epitome of what a young man might aim for – girls like him, he’s clever, charismatic and good looking; he’s like the popular kid at school.  Sean, his therapist, is the only person who really recognises how lonely and scared Will is. Sean is a deeply emotional man without a trace of ego who has experienced deep love and grief. He is one of the only people in the film to truly show up for Will and act in his best interest. He shows Will what it could look like if he was brave enough to address his childhood trauma, love himself and let someone else see the deepest and darkest parts of himself. With Sean’s help, Will begins to let his walls down and let in the possibility that he could be loved. Sean’s character asks us not only what kind of image we want young men to look up to but also the qualities we value in a human of any gender – kindness, compassion, and showing up for people in meaningful ways.  

Adam in All of Us Strangers (2023) 

Adam is one of the only people living in a new-build block of flats somewhere on the outskirts of London, looking out at life but not really living it. He is a man who has very realistic mental health struggles, he is lonely and doesn’t have all the answers figured out. There are so many beautifully complex aspects of Adam’s character. He is a gay man who grew up in the 80s with parents who loved him but failed him in many ways. They passed away when he was 12 and we see how Adam desperately wants to see them again and know what they think of who he is and the life he has led. Adam’s longing for family and acceptance is palpable, and the film is soaked with his grief.  

Adam opens himself up to new love and connection and talks honestly about what it was like to grow up with homophobic parents in a time when gay men were discriminated.  He is patient, hopeful, a good listener and cares deeply for the people in his life; his power is his vulnerability and his deep emotional capacity which we rarely see on screen. 

John Whitfield (“Divine G”) and Clarence Maclin (“Divine Eye”) in Sing Sing (2024) 

Sing Sing is a true story set in a maximum-security prison. It explores how a community of men, brought together by a drama group, support each other, learn how to be vulnerable and have hope for the future despite their hopeless surroundings. 

We see this most clearly through Divine Eye, who joins the drama group at the beginning of the film. When he joins the group he carries a knife in his waistband and its easy to see how full of anger he is. He struggles to embrace the community and sincerity of the group and believes he will only ever be a criminal. 

It is his incredible bravery and willingness to change, coupled with Divine G’s relentless determination to help both him and Divine Eye be released, which helps Eye start to believe that he might be capable of achieving more than dealing drugs at the prison. This film is one of my favourite depictions of male friendship, and it gives a reference for what uplifting, supportive, vulnerable male friendships could look like. I think the world might be a very different place if more friendships like these existed. 

What makes these characters ‘positive male role models’ isn’t that they are perfect – lots of them are emotionally complex and really struggle to understand and express their feelings. They’re not always portrayed as emotionally intelligent people, but we see in these films how they love deeply, care about the people in their life and show up for people in a meaningful way. They have realistic mental health and self-esteem issues (which we know from research a lot of men do – we just don’t talk about it enough!) and through the help and support of those around them they begin to talk about it. These are all characters I would want in my life – they are neither abusive nor boring, they are real, messy and full of love and kindness to give to the people in their life. I believe that if we could show more realistic men on screen – men who are full of depth, emotion and complexity – then we could inspire young boys and men to believe in themselves more.