A Different Kind of Hero: How Doctor Who shaped my understanding of masculinity and humanity

As part of their FeelScene campaign, Brook’s 20-24 Participation Advisory Group (PAG) are reflecting on the ways that media has shaped our perceptions of sex, relationships and identity. In this blog, Oscar explores masculinity and role models for boys and young men through one of his biggest influences: Doctor Who.

It is November 2013. My parents are about to start a lifelong obsession of mine. They’re about to introduce me to hours of joy, about to create at least 4 Halloween outfits and a couple of world book day outfits too (I took liberties okay, there are technically books). My parents were about to change my life. This may sound like a rather dramatic way to talk about a 9-year-old’s discovery of Doctor Who, and maybe you’re right, but if you stick with me, I’m going to share with you why this show impacted my life so much.  

The boy who sat there, with his eyes glued to his first saving of the universe, is small and young for his year group. He is slightly shy, and doesn’t quite ‘get’ football as a recreational activity. The episode playing is the 50^th anniversary episode of the longest running sci-fi series in the world. What takes place is a raucous adventure through modern-day London, Elizabethan England, and the war-torn planet of Gallifrey. The plot of this episode barely conceals themes of the collateral fallout of war, the terrible mental toll on those who survive, and the ethics behind the use of weapons of mass destruction. I missed all of this (I was 9 afterall!), however, what I did see was bravado and wit.

What I did see were problems solved not with a gun or fists or superhuman strength, but by a clever and compassionate man. Enter: The Doctor.  

Lesson 1: The power of communication

When the show was rebooted in 2005, the first episode that aired, ‘Rose’, is for me defined by the moment in which the doctor discards the opportunity to surprise his foe, saying “I’m not here to kill it. I’ve got to give it a chance.” Unfortunately for The Doctor, the chances he gives are rarely taken, as entertaining action demands it. However, that forgiven, there is a statement of goodwill there. The Doctor was not willing to give up on them and give in to hostility so easily, and I like to think that it has taught me a certain tolerance too. 

Talking with people is the best way to understand them, and the best way to make yourself understood. This point on communication is not lost on the writers of Doctor Who; The Doctor speaks a seemingly endless number of languages (including baby and horse, naturally) for this precise reason. One of the Doctor’s many ‘superpowers’, for lack of a better term, is being able to talk freely with everyone. Good communication is a valuable thing for any role model to have.  

Lesson 2: The value of emotional expression

As an extension of this, Doctor Who also is a champion of emotional expression. He is seen to cry, to express joy over anything and everything, to share deep emotional connections with his friends. Above all things the Doctor can be described as compassionate, and he constantly shows deep care for the people he protects, as well as plenty of others. The Doctor’s enemies often act as opposites to these traits. Take the cybermen, for example. They are cyborgs, robotically enhanced humans, hell-bent on the principle that emotions are a flaw to be fixed. Humanity is to be ‘upgraded’ to reach greater things. Cybermen are cold and uniform as a result. The Doctor is their ultimate opposite, and his defiance of them is in defiance of locking your emotions up in a steel suit of armour and calling it an improvement. The Doctor finds joy and wonder in many things and spends much of our time reminding us that these things should not be given up on. 

There are many hobbies and emotions expressed that others found weird, or not masculine enough, that I didn’t stop or hide. This was at least in part because The Doctor had shown me that doing things that make you happy is something normal and that you don’t have to listen to other people to tell you what should make you happy. It made it easier for me to be comfortable in my masculinity too.

I didn’t ever feel a need to ‘perform’ my gender for other people. I was just me, and me made me happy. 

Lesson 3: The beauty of diversity

Diversity and novelty are largely why he travels around the universe. The Daleks, perhaps the most quintessentially British evil cyborg, may appear to be run-of-the-mill evil imperialist. A closer look reveals an obsession with Dalek purity – genetic purity. A Dalek will despise all that is not Dalek. There is no recruitment of those deemed inferior, just extermination. When hatred of others is founded in intrinsic and unchangeable core parts of someone or a group, whether that be skin colour, or genetics, or sexuality, then you have a fascist. Doctor Who makes this very digestible. Because a Dalek is always the same, we can see the traits that make them this way (hatred and intolerance) much more clearly. Fascism creates uniformity. 

I think I kind of got this point even as a child. The show really champions the value of being different from each other. Curiosity and investment in other cultures, and peoples is enriching, not just on a personal level, but a societal one. It really encouraged me to look past surface level differences and see people as, well, people. For example, I find that lots of people I see online believe that men can’t be true, platonic friends with women. This saddens me because the women in my life are invaluable to the way I perceive the world, my social support structure, and the hobbies I do. 

My politics have definitely been influenced by Doctor Who normalising the vast range of experiences, knowledge, culture and bad puns other people can bring into your life. Where a fascist will often tell you there is ‘good’ and ‘bad’, or ‘right’ and ‘wrong’, Doctor Who told me that most of the time, there is only ‘different’, and that’s okay. More than that, it can be beautiful. 

Doctor Who really helped me redefine what a hero could be. I could be friends with women. I could be vulnerable with my emotions. I could be a leader without being physically domineering. I could change myself and still be me.  

Part of my reason for writing this blog is the resurgence of far right-wing ideologies in the UK, but across the world as well. We as men have never been very good at talking with each other. Women have built communities and social support structures for themselves in their shared experiences. Many male role models constantly tell us that we must be impenetrable, powerful, self-sufficient in the name of masculinity. Women have had much more time to be outraged at the impossible expectations of their gender and then breaking away from them. I think it’s about time we took steps to follow.

Masculinity is much more flexible than many people would have us believe. My life is infinitely richer for this information, and I hope that anyone reading this thinks that this is worth considering. I wrote this blog to recommend positive role models for men, and The Doctor is mine. So, please treat yourselves with kindness. Others too of course. Love your friends with abandon. Learn fun facts and share them. Be passionate about your favourite shows. And of course, treat yourself every now and then and watch some Doctor Who.